I thought the sunburn pain would be gone after a day. The whole sleeping on my back last night was not fun. I guess i never realized how the only way I successfully sleep and get a full night’s rest is when sleeping flat on my stomach. Oh well I suppose I have no choice, it’s probably best if I try and get some rest so I hopefully wake up to good news from my dad tomorrow morning. I don’t think it’s possible to want something as much as I want this . I want my family to be ok again, that’s all.
And I ran through the woods, I ran and ran with feet so bare they could feel every leaf, every twig. Whether it was the alcohol or the neverending space, I did not know. But I was free.
People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.